Ninja Marathon: Ninjasploitation craziness from the 80s!

Festival
HÕFF 2022
Programme
HÕFF Retro
Subject
humour, retro, men

Hiding in a tree, burrowing underground, bubbling underwater or simply playing back in reverse – wherever you may look, there’s bound to be some ninjas there, hiding in silly camouflage. If your knowledge of Ninjitsu is still lacking some, then these three amazingly fun ninja flics are sure to make you an expert! Shamelessly gravity-defying kung fu, nostalgically grainy VHS esthetics and outrageously stereotypical, nay, bordering on racist dubbing make this crazy tri-marathon an absolute must for all the fun-seeking crowd at HÕFF. In all sincerity, such so-bad-it’s-good vs so-good-it’s-amazing ratio is hard to come by in cinema.

All the screenings are in English, with English subtitles.

Screenings

Keldrisaal Haapsalu kultuurikeskus
ScreeningNinja-maraton: Pöörane ninja-hullus 80ndatest!

Films

The Super Ninja aka The Ninja Squad: Killers Invincible aka Cobra Force

Local title
Super-ninja
Director
Kuo-Ren Wu
Country
Taiwan, South Korea, Hong Kong
Year
1984
Programme
HÕFF Retro
Subject
violence, erotica, men

John (Alexander Lou) is a New York City cop and also quite the super ninja. Together with his partner Spencer (Eugene Thomas) they uncover an international plot that had something to do with a chemical compound or some such nonsense but the plot here is obviously unimportant. What’s key here is the explosive action, fast ninjitsu kung fu to make one’s head explode, stereotypes strong enough to restore one’s love of humanity, and also... quite probably the world’s lengthiest sex scene. This ninja film is, simply put - superb.

Director
Kuo-Ren Wu
Screenwriter
Kang-Nien Li
Cast
Alexander Rei Lo, Eugene Thomas, Mei Lo
Runtime
Language
English
Subtitles
English
Trailer

Ninjas, Condors 13 aka Ninja Condors

Local title
Ninja, kondorid 13
Director
Kuo-Ren Wu
Country
Hong Kong
Year
1987
Programme
HÕFF Retro
Subject
violence, betrayal, men

Having tragically lost his parents due to some motorcycles being used as murder weapons, Brian the ninja (Alexander Lou) must now follow his conscience to confront his evil ninja master and do some serious fighting. Lots of violence. Lots of corruption. Lots of melancholy-filled dialogue. But even more... ninjas.

Director
Kuo-Ren Wu
Screenwriter
Godfrey Ho
Cast
Alexander Rei Lo, Stuart Hugh, Timothy Johnson
Runtime
Language
English
Subtitles
English
Trailer

Ninja: The Final Duel

Local title
Ninja: viimne duell
Director
Robert Tai
Country
Taiwan
Year
1986
Programme
HÕFF Retro
Subject
violence, humour, absurd

In this final masterpiece of the evening we go all feudal, where the virtuous kung-fu hero Wang Chi Chung (Alexander Lou) must fend off the evil Ji Ho Ninjas from taking over the Shaolin Temple. The ever goofy ninja weirdness goes without saying, but we also get to see some Krishna munks fight off a stereotypically black monk from Harlem (Eugene Thomas), the bush-naked Alice Cheng jumps out of her bath to fight off some sneaky ninjas in a wet battle of glory that is testament to the very art of cinema itself, and also, some privileged eyes still awake at this point get to witness the weirdest thing ever captured on celluloid film – The Water Spider Assault Unit!

Director
Robert Tai
Cast
Alexander Rei Lo, Alice Tseng, Alan Lee
Runtime
Language
English
Subtitles
English
Trailer